you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
