Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
