You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
