If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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