I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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