like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
