Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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