We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
