Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
