How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
