You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
There r osticjed everywhere
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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