Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
My dick has a subreddit
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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