I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
