There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize