She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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