His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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