I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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