Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
