i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
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