just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
