this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Let the clothes fall where they may.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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