it wasn't lemon gatorade
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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