Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize