you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
