You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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