this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
