How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize