No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
there was a trapeze. enough said
Everything about him screamed your future.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
