who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
