great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
