What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
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