Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We had sex on a dog bed..
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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