Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
