i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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