Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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