My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize