Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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