It's like God shit irony all over that family
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize