i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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