Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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