I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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