dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize