Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize