cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
