I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
