nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
she peed on how many people?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize