So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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