hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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