We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
dude i'm inner monologue high
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
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