We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
